In Conclusion...
One caveat as you seek friendships is that you need to feel good about the people with whom you surround yourself. Unfortunately, one negative
aspect of mothers' friendships is competition. It is human nature to compare your child's development to that of another child, to worry
if your child is slow to talk, or to secretly feel pride that he crawled before anyone else. However, do not waste time with a so-called
friend who spends all her time touting her own child's genius while subtly putting down your child. If you're unsure of your feelings, ask
yourself if you would trust your friend to baby sit your child for an afternoon. If the answer is no, then it's time to find a new friend.
Kathy and I bonded over the trials and tribulations of the first year of motherhood. Her son and my son have now been friends for over two years, to the point where they ask for
one another when separated and give hugs to one when the other is crying. Kathy and I meet almost daily to enjoy coffee and conversation while our boys play contentedly together - at
least most of the time! Kathy was the one who consoled me when my pediatrician told me that Danny was going to be abnormally small for life (it turned out he was wrong); I in turn
reassured Kathy when her son developed a talent for pretending to choke -- just to see Kathy panic.
If you already have close friends with whom you can share the experience of motherhood, then consider yourself lucky. If you are still looking for people with whom to connect, don't give up. There are others just like you - you
just haven't found them yet. Push yourself to get out of the house, to strike up conversations with others, to join groups specifically for families. Before long you will find the friendship and support that is so vital for
mothers, whether their children are 8 months or 18 years old.
By Lacey Worrell
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