The Art of Conversation:
“Tennis and the Art of
Conversation - Part II”
So, exactly how is conversation like tennis?
An example of the game where you stand no chance of hitting the ball back was someone I met on a plane.
For three hours she spoke and I listened. Well, I hid, actually. Whatever I said, she had done it, twice, for longer and with more success.
We started talking as the plane took off. By cruising altitude I could have been reading a book and she wouldn't have noticed. I felt that I'd been beaten.
The tennis coach approach is my friend Mike. He has the enviable gift of remembering people’s names, can talk for hours to the man who’s mending the toilet
and then talk for hours to a consultant neurosurgeon. He raises and lowers his game to match the partner.
An example of playing against my dog Gracie is talking to my friend Jackie. You say something to Jackie and somehow she runs off and buries it. She takes every comment
and instead of playing it back, she buries it by saying something about herself.
‘Guess what Jackie, I crashed my car into a tree.’
‘We did that last week. The car won't be working for a month’
‘And I broke both my legs.’
‘Well my hip’s giving me a lot of pain at the moment.’
‘Ok, well I'd better go.’
‘I'll be going in a minute.’
Somehow you get tired of hitting the ball over the net and it not coming back.
Wouldn't a better conversation be:
‘Guess what Jackie, I crashed my car into a tree.’
‘Oh no, are you ok?’
‘I think I've broken both my legs.’
‘So how did you walk to my house?’
‘I hitched a lift.’
‘Good thinking. I'd give you a lift back but our car isn't working either.’
‘Oh? Why not?’
And so it continues. It’s a game of tennis. The conversation is a rally.
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