Gossip - Is it Good or Bad?
I have to admit that I have a love/hate relationship with gossip. Just like most people, I find a juicy little tidbit
of gossip almost irresistible. Whose getting divorced, whose kid just got arrested, and who recently got implants is
the type of information that we all gather around the “water cooler” to hear.
To the males that are reading this article, be honest. You know that you like the occasion little bit of gossip as
well. After all, when one guy says to another, “I went on a date with that blonde from Accounting last night and she
was…” that’s gossip, and you enjoy hearing it as much as any female.
I also hate gossip. Gossip has been the ruin of countless marriages, reputations and friendships. It has caused many
a sleepless night, painfully embarrassing situations, and even suicide.
Gossip Defined
What exactly is gossip? Merriam Webster’s Dictionary defines it as “a rumor or report of an intimate nature.” (504) Notice
the definition says nothing about the report being made with harmful intent. To put it simply, when you talk
about the intimate details of someone else’s life, you are gossiping.
So is Gossip Good or Bad?
It depends on what you're saying and why. Simply discussing the details of someone else’s life without malicious intent is not
bad in and of itself. But be forewarned, gossip of any type can have disastrous results. (Would you want the person being
discussed to get wind of what you are saying?)
However, there is gossip that is “bad gossip” no two ways about it. Gossip that is spread around with the intent of ruining
someone’s reputation is bad gossip. Gossip that includes information that has been disclosed in the strictest confidence is
bad gossip. Gossip that is completely untrue, of course, is bad gossip.
A Great Alternative to Gossip
Some of us gossip just so that we can have something interesting to say to hold our conversation partner’s attention. Knowing
a scandalous piece of gossip can make you really popular for the moment, but master practitioners of the art of conversation
would rather share interesting facts that are positive and informative.
By preparing interesting things to say in advance, we
can hold our conversation partner’s interest without revealing someone else’s “business” or sullying their name.
We all occasionally like to hear a little gossip. Its human nature to be interested in the people we encounter, but knowing
the difference between typical gossip and bad gossip (avoiding the later altogether) is essential if we want to be masters
of the art of conversation.
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