Remembering Names and The Art of Conversation
Has this ever happened to you? You are attending a party, a convention or some other event and you are introduced to several people that you would like to get
to know, but seconds later, you find that you can't remember anyone’s name.
Even worse, have you ever started to introduce someone you've known for years and
suddenly you can't remember his or her name? How embarrassing. What you are suffering from is the “meeting someone new jitters”.
What Causes the Jitters?
It’s only human nature to want to make a good impression on the people that we meet. No one wants to be laughed at, despised, or considered odd, so the first
impression we make on people is very important. So, instead of concentrating on the names of the people we are being introduced to, we may be trying to put
the perfect smile on our face, we may be attempting not to seem awkward when shaking hands, or perhaps nerves simply wipes our memory clean.
The same is true when we are the person making the introduction. We are the center of attention at that moment and for some of us that’s a lot of
pressure. Nervousness can cause our memory to temporarily fail.
It Can Happen to Anyone.
First of all, don't let incidents like these discourage you. Even the most outgoing person who seems to have a PhD in making good conversation forgets a name
or two from time to time. Since everyone has had the “meeting someone new jitters” at one time or the other, there’s no need to think you've made a bad
impression just because you can't remember someone’s name, even if its your best friend’s.
How Do You Remember Names?
There are many techniques that you can use to remember someone’s name, but there are two of them that I find to be very effective, especially when used together.
I find that repeating the name of the person you've just been introduced to, causes it to stick in your memory. So when someone says, “This is my friend
Bill.” I would reply, “Nice to meet you Bill.”
The second technique I use associates something about Bill’s appearance, either a prominent feature or an article of clothing, with his name. So if Bill happens to
have an interestingly shaped nose, I would associate his name with it. Then, every time I look at Bill’s face, his nose would remind me of his name.
I Still Can't Remember. Now What?
To put it simply, just ask. Again, since we've all forgotten the name of someone we've just met, politely asking someone to repeat their name shouldn't present a
problem. Simply say, “I'm sorry but I've met so many people here today that I'm not remembering any names. Please tell me what your name is again?”
And in the situation where you've forgotten the name of someone you know quite well, make a joke of it and move on.
Don't let meeting new people and the awkward situations that can arise cause you to miss out on the opportunity to have great conversations, and perhaps make
a new friend. You can conquer the “meeting someone new jitters.” Remember to repeat back the name of the person you've been introduced to, and associate the
name with the person’s appearance, and you will be able to handle meeting new people, and remembering their names, like a pro.
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